Sunday, December 28, 2008

Fear Gateways - December 08 Newsletter

Fear Gateways
This last month I and most of my clients and students seem to be experiencing more pronounced waves of fear. After teaching and living genius over the last 5 years I'm now recognizing this as a process that occurs before something new and expanded comes in. For example I sometimes get shaky, scared and tense before a new speaking gig, and within about the first 5 minutes that fear has turned to passion that is transmitted through me to the audience. I feel like when this happens I'm being prepared to hold more space and there is more energy moving though me. I'm not even totally sure that it is fear, it's simply big waves of energy. It becomes fear when I constrict. The image I have is of a rocket getting ready to take off, building up its power and energy. I invite you to see your waves of fear and uncomfortability as your body supercharging you, getting you ready to explore uncharted territory.

Tips and Tools
Can't you just feel the changes coming? In my own life things feel fast. I feel like so much is happening so quickly. I feel excited and sometimes overwhelmed. I notice that it is so important right now to do the things that ground me. When I take the time to check in with myself I can really take in all the shifts and new energy coming through. I notice that when I haven't taken the time to journal, meditate, or bounce on my new mini tramp is when I feel like everything is happening so fast and I get dizzy. My wish for you this season is that you take time to ground and ready yourself for this brilliant new year full of possibilities.

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Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Peeking Out

I am peeking out now since taking time to play and wonder. Grateful to myself for not moving forward until a clear vision and passion emerged. I'm so excited and passionate for what I'm co-creating. A genius community..a community of people who are supporting each other to reach out, step out, go deep, and live large. I invite you to go to www.geniuscommunitynest.com to see some of our genius players. Why just hire anyone when you could hire a genius?
I realized that it's not enough to create success for myself. It's way more fun to take people with me. I hope you let your dreams gestate too.
There will be more updates later.
Merry Merry
Megan

Friday, June 27, 2008

Do You Serve Your Own Heart - June 08 Newsletter

Aloha
The other day I was sharing with my partner Annabeth that I’m just not that in to anything right now and that all I want to do is go sit on a beach in Hawaii. Always ready to support, she replied “Go do it.” I responded with a litany of "buts". I struck a compromise and decided to take a break from all the projects I’m working on and I committed to go sit myself up the canyon by a river.

The next morning I was playing tennis with my friend and colleague Carol Tuttle. I told her about my conversation the night before and she said, "I’m going to Hawaii next week why don’t you come and stay with us." I started in with my "but" parade again and she started laughing saying the universe is giving me what I asked for and I’m still “thinking about it.” So about ½ hour later I shot her a text saying: “Aloha.”

Follow Your Heart, Not Your Money
After about a month of “trying” to make a bunch of projects happen, I got clear about what my heart really wanted (to sit on the beach) and it appeared. It doesn’t make sense for me to take off to Hawaii at this time, and yet it is the only thing that makes sense. It's super easy to get caught up in making a living and checking off things on the to do list; just going through the motions. Even if we are doing something that is important to us, this is survival living. I caught myself going through the motions and forgot to follow my own wisdom. In my genius work I encourage people to follow their bliss and money will follow. If we go after money, we give our power away to money. If we follow our heart, we empower and value ourselves at the deepest level. I believe that money is energy and as such it is here to support us in fulfilling our purpose. We are not here to be in service of money.

Tips and Tools
Take a look at your daily activities. Are you serving your heart or are you serving money? Are you passionate about what you do every day or are you going through the motions? Is there something you really want to do but keep telling yourself there is not enough time or money for? Make a commitment to take a step towards this. Do something that your heart wants to do today, even if it is small. This will start the process of honoring your heart first. I’d love to hear your thoughts.

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Sunday, June 1, 2008

SITBATICAL

So hello everyone. I notice that it's been awhile. Just thought I would update you on where I've been. I became aware recently that I've been going through the motions with a bunch of projects in my life. I got it that I need to take some time to check in and see where I really want to focus my energy. At last week's LifeWorks (my company) meeting, I told my team that I was going to take a few weeks away from all the business stuff to get clear about the future direction of the company. I playfully shared that I was taking a sabbatical from my own business. As it turns out the only thing I'm drawn to do is go sit on a beach and so that is what I plan to do. I shared this with my friend Dan Howard and he said it looked like I was really taking a sitbatical. That felt more appropriate. So I'm going to go sit and see what's next.

There is so much that I can share and teach from my last 13 years of being a life coach and facilitator and what I get now is that it is time to refine to see what is the juiciest thing that I want to share and teach about.

I will be checking in from time to time to give you updates as I have them. In the meantime, I suggest you take some time to see what it is you are really about. I'm getting that living in my genius means that I am continually refining who I am and what I'm about. So what is most important to you at this time?

Aloha...
Megan

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Boston or Bust

So, I'm off to Boston to give a speech at the Financial Planners Association's National Conference. It's the night before take off and I'm running around getting things ready for the trip. I suspect that I am keeping busy so that I don't feel my fear. I've been playing a lot with fear as this is my first big travel speaking event and is a result of a commitment to be an international speaker.
In my genius work, I teach people about fear gateways, which are sort of a right of passage as we reach into our next level of genius. The cool part is that when you understand this you can use that fear as fuel as you step through the opening. (To learn more about fear gateways go to my website www.megansillito.com and click on genius.)

People have asked me why I feel scared as I know this material so well. My answer to them is: "It is not logical, it's just what I'm going through as I step in to this new arena. In my experience, people who commit to take the big step forward in the direction of their genius and life purpose all go through some sort of rabbit hole which becomes its own refiners fire.

One thing that I have learned from this particular fire is that I can choose what I want to feed. I realized the other day that what I was feeling was exactly the same feeling I had as a teenager the morning of a big basketball tournament which was the odd combination of total excitement and total fear. Basketball was my favorite thing in the world at that time. I loved the thrill of competition and that was always accompanied by a hill of fear. When I realized this, I got it that I was also very excited about this speaking trip. I had only been focusing on the fear part. However, I can choose to give the excitement more focus. Like the old saying: If you have two wolves at your feet the one that will stay is the one you feed.

So I've been noticing when I feel scared and taking a moment to tune in and breathe in to the excitement as well. As the famous psychologist Fritz Pearls said, "Fear is excitement without the breath." It's been a delicate balance to face directly in to the fear while also giving attention to my excitement.

Hope this might serve any of you who might be in the middle of a leap or transition in your life. Let yourself also feel the excitement of the adventure as well.

Bon Voyage
Megan

Sunday, April 27, 2008

April Showers - April 08 Newsletter

April Showers
We’ve had a lot of rainy weather here in the desert of late. As in the saying "April showers bring May flowers," Mother Nature is preparing itself for growth. In this phase, the ground is being made ready. In our own lives this is a very important phase that many of us often skip in favor of "doing" and trying to make things happen. The thing I have learned by watching nature is that it is always seeking balance and it never forces. I know that when I have skipped this preparation cycle I end up pushing and forcing things. When I pay attention and nurture the incubation process of the ideas that want to be birthed that they easily and naturally come to fruition. In this way I am a steward for what is coming through me as opposed to trying to make something happen. For me, this is the difference of being in flow and being in the struggle. When I notice myself struggling I can be sure that I have skipped the vital process of incubation. What this process of incubation looks like for me is noticing my thoughts, noticing what’s grabbing my attention and noticing what my natural impulses are. These things all give me clues as to what is wanting to come through me.

Reverend Deborah L. Johnson says in her book, The Sacred Yes, “What is being birthed has it’s own timing, it’s own gestation period, it’s own sense of when it is ready to spring forth. No amount of forcing, planning or setting of time lines and schedules will alter this one iota.”

So let it rain. Clear your mind so that the Divine ideas wanting to be birthed through you can take root.

Tips and Tools
If you want to know what it is that wants to come through you, try this on:

Take a small notebook with you for about a week. Write down the themes in your thinking and the things you are drawn to. Areas may include:
  • Music
  • Books
  • Colors
  • Movies
  • Foods
  • Places

What are your natural impulses? Do you want to:
  • move
  • rest
  • dance
  • simply be quiet?

Just notice the process that is happening through you. What is extraordinary to me is that this is all happening without our conscious effort or intent. Paying attention is a fabulous way to nurture the process unfolding within.

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Sunday, April 20, 2008

Heart Matters

Today is my fathers 91st birthday, a young buck really when you consider my mother who turned 95 on January 1st. They are in the hospital together, my dad went in for a stroke and my mother, not to be outdone, came in a day later with pneumonia. My father has also been diagnosed with dementia. He sang songs that made no sense and he joined me in singing happy birthday to him. He came in and out of lucidity and yet this was one of my favorite conversations with him. During his life he was a brilliant man, a scholar, a bishop and father of 14. But since a heart attack and subsequent quadruple bi-pass about 15 years ago my father has come out of his head and into his heart.

As a little girl I always saw his big heart. I used to write him poetry. "Dear old Dad, only one I've ever had." (My poetry was quite profound even then.) I used to call him cuddly and he and the the rest of the family used to think that was the funniest thing they had ever heard, as he was quite a stern man. It wasn't until I became a teenager that I lost my ability to see who he really was.

I'm glad I'm back in my heart now so that I can enjoy this time of nonsense and tenderness. He told me today that he always knows it's me on the phone because I call him POP. I said, "Is that because I'm the only one that calls you that?" He said "Not only that but I can feel the tenderness of your heart beneath the word."

I'm hoping that I can keep cultivating conscious dementia so that I can continue to appreciate the important parts of life.
Happy Birthday Pop
I love you forever
Megan

Sunday, April 13, 2008

The Body Knows

I feel happy today. It's the warmest day of the year so far. I love how the sun feeds me and nourishes me. I've felt for awhile that my body needs the sun and have thought that all of this stuff about fearing the sun is a bunch of bull crap. When I let myself soak in the rays I feel more alive and healthy. I was talking to the Doc at my office about this and he mentioned that most sunscreens cause more cancer than the sun because of all of the chemicals. Being a sun baby, that makes me happy and intuitively feels right to me. I just don't like stuff between me and my sun.

I think all of us instinctually know what is best for us. I believe my body holds a tremendous amount of untapped wisdom. I think my body has always talked to me and I'm now getting better at listening. I find that when I listen to my body, life is so much more ease full and fun. For much of my life I've depended on my mental intellect to survive. As I tap more in to my body's wisdom I'm finding more of a peace and an experience of being that I never got from thinking.

Lately I've been practicing simply noticing my breath. Feeling my chest expand and listening to my breath as it comes in and out. I notice that when I do that my thoughts stop and it gives me a few moments of simply being. I've felt more able to listen to what my body is telling me since starting this practice. I seem to know what I want and need more easily.

I find that if I ask a question while consciously breathing and moving that I discover ways of looking at and addressing things that would have never occurred from just trying to figure stuff out.

So what wisdom does your body have to share with you?
Tune in and see.
Peace Out
Megan

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Spring Fever - March 08 Newsletter

Reaching Down, Reaching Up
My friend Auretha pointed out to me that at this time of year the plants in the ground are reaching their roots down into the earth to gather the nutrients they need to spring forth from the ground. So I’ve been practicing reaching down into myself to get the energy and focus I need for this year. I’ve been doing this by resting, allowing myself to take naps and sitting in the sun to write and read. I invite you to ask yourself the following questions:
  • Where do you need to go to nourish yourself?
  • What are you stretching into?
Check out the Tips and Tools section (below) for a great body centered activity that will get you fully in tune with this.

Death and Rebirth
It’s also Easter time, which for me I think of death and rebirth, a time of transition. I think at this time we are coming out of the death of winter and into creation of spring. I asked a question at the dinner table tonight that I want to share with you. What is dying in you and what are you giving birth to at this time? My answer to this question was that my will power is dying and I’m giving birth to my willingness. All of us at the table were able to bring to consciousness the vital process that was going on deep inside ourselves. Try it on for yourself.

Tips and Tools
I believe that learning isn’t complete until we get it in the body, so here is a whole body activity to assist you in birthing your new creations this year. Do this activity on your hands and knees if your health and flexibility allow. You can also do this activity sitting. It would be great if you could actually do this outside for full effect, but indoors will do if your ego or the weather doesn't allow it.

Activity:
Feel all of the parts of you that are touching the ground. Now imagine you could grow roots from your feet, knees and hands down into the earth. When you sense the roots are in deep, begin to feel them sucking up nutrients and imagine this energy coming up and filling your whole body with life and energy. Take some full belly breaths in as you do this. Breathing up the nourishment and breathing out back into the earth. Do this for a few minuets until you feel a flow of energy. When you feel this flow, begin to stand upright stretching your limbs in as many directions as you can. Stand on your tippy toes and stretch your fingers way out. Imagine as you do this that you are stretching into life and your dreams. Notice how you feel in your body. Make sure and generate some clear pictures of what you want to create as you do this. Remember your mind creates with thoughts and images; your body creates through feeling and movement. This activity engages your whole body in the cycle of creation. I recommend that you do this practice every day for a week, and longer if you like.

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Sunday, March 23, 2008

An Once of Prevention

I'm feeling so much better. Thanks to all who sent me positive intentions for my healing. I've been getting feedback from my body caregivers that I'm making an incredible recovery. I believe that when you directly address the emotional issues of any physical problem that recovery is sped up considerably.

A friend of mine, Julianna, who is in a graduate program with my mentor Kathlyn Hendricks, called me up during my recovery process to share with me something that she had learned in one of her classes. She told me that she had learned that body pains were an indication of withholding. So she asked me if I had any withholds. By the way withholds are when you have feelings /thoughts/ judgments that you haven't acknowledged to yourself or others. This holding "back" (get it) puts a tremendous amount of pressure on our bodies. I most often think of it as something I haven't spoken to someone that is putting a wedge in my relationship. In the case of my back injury I realized that I was withholding from myself, including sadness that I had held back for over 23 years.

I wanted to share this with you to give you the opportunity to breath into any aches and pains you might have and ask yourself "Is there anything I am withholding from myself or others? Is there anything that I'm resisting feeling?" What I know is that if I'm not proactively cleaning house then I usually create some cosmic 2x4 to remind me of what I haven't been willing to look at. I hope you can let yourself learn form me and don't "hold back."

And, once of prevention is worth a pound of cure... An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Ok, I'll stop. You get the point.
Later
Megan

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Body Talk

Friday I was playing tennis and pulled my lower back. Luckily I had a massage already scheduled for that day. On the table Margaret (my massage therapist) said this feels really emotional and asked what was happening right before this happened? I told her that I had lost 8 games in a row to someone I felt I should be beating. The point I hurt myself on, I missed and was very angry. I realized that even though I've been practicing self love now for several years that I still am very hard on myself in sports.

I took this back even further to coming down to the US from Canada at 15 years old, a little greenie ready to take on the basketball world and become an Olympian. I ran into coach Freestone whose style was to tear you down so you would prove her wrong. Sadly, I believed her and took myself out of the game and my dreams. Later I found out that she was telling her first string varsity team that I would take one of their positions on the team before years end. I felt huge waves of grief and sadness at not having gone all the way with that dream. I had known this but never felt it all the way through it.

I realized that I've been internally coaching myself from this place ever since. That even though I'm a Genius coach and see the potential of others and cheer them on, I don't do the same for myself. I'm often critical and expect perfection from myself.

I'm also in the middle of another transition where I am moving into being an international speaker and I have not been my own best activist. This weekend I have had some time to think, since I have been confined to sitting until I can get into my chiropractor on Monday. I see this injury as a gift. To remind me to love myself and to learn to coach myself in an entirely new way. I wonder if I might have been taking myself out of yet another dream. As much as I use all the skills and tools I teach, I realize that I haven't been holding myself as whole which is the most essential thing a coach can do for their clients. I feel like I have created a tremendous amount of success for myself even with this old coaching style, so I'm excited to see what I can create from using my own inner genius coach to champion me both on and off the court. I recommit to see myself as whole.

I have already made the Varsity Speaking team and I am playing first string. As a starting player I commit play full out.

So, dear reader what "Varsity Team" have you already made that in your mind you are still trying out for? Would you be willing to congratulate yourself and start playing?

Peace Out
Megan

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Massacre Update

Hey Fellow Valentine's Fans,

Well, I've always said whatever you focus on expands. So, on Valentine's Day, minutes after this post, I co-created a fight with my beloved. Funny!!! or NOT? My own little massacre, which, thank heavens for our commitment to skills, only lasted about 20 minutes. It actually created an opening for an amazing flow of love and appreciation later on that evening. So, if you read this too late or just couldn't help yourself, remember that you can still learn and grow a lot in the aftermath. In the meantime I would like to add 2 more items to my Massacre List:
  1. Focus on what creates relationship upsets and then write about it on your blog.
  2. Make sure that by writing your blog on Valentine's Day right before you are supposed to leave for your romantic get away, that you run a 1/2 hour late of when agreed to leave.
We have lots of time to prepare for next year!
Laughing and slightly blushing...
Megan

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Valentine's Day Massacres

So here we are on the proverbial love day!!! Hmmm...interesting that it is connected to some sort of a massacre. I never was very good with history. Anyway, I was thinking about this in connection to what I see as a relationships coach at this time of year. Holy Cow!!! So many couples or hopeful couples tend to create upsets on this day. I have observed many relationship "Valentine's Day Massacres," so I've decided to create a Valentine's Day Massacre List so that you can be at choice of whether you want a massacre or don't.

HOW TO INSURE A VALENTINE'S DAY MASSACRE
Megan's Top Ten

  1. Don't Love Yourself and expect that your partner should do this for you.
  2. Make sure you put a lot of expectations on what your partner should be doing for you today.
  3. Hope they will surprise you in some way, but don't tell them you like surprises.
  4. Try to make up for all the appreciation and love that you have not been fully expressing all year and try to shove it all into this one day.
  5. Wait
  6. If you are single, notice all the couples around you and begin to think how much better and sweeter your life would be if you were in a relationship. Keep obsessing about it.
  7. Give as much as you can to your partner, go overboard, in hopes of it being returned. Then get really resentful if they don't return the giving.
  8. Assume all the other couples are having a romantic day except you.
  9. Hope your partner remembers.
  10. If your partner doesn't show up in the way you think they should, make them feel really guilty and pressure them to make up for it with a huge birthday demonstration. This way you can also be right on your birthday that they really don't appreciate you.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

To Be is To Grow

Thanks for you response Angie, I appreciate the opportunity to clarify. I know it seems like what I wrote was about doings, however a baby isn't trying to grow tall he just does. He isn't trying to learn language he just does. So in the natural cycle of being it's not that there is an absence of doing but that it occurs as a natural consequence of being. Nature is never inactive it is always evolving, even when it is dying, it is in motion. Most adults however do things to try to get an outcome rather than to originate movement from their natural state of being. It would be like a rose trying to come up in the middle of winter. I think we can sometimes cultivate our being by not doing anything, in fact I think it is a lovely experiment to try on, and, we can also express our being in action.
One of my favorite practices I learned from Gay Hendricks is called Alpha Days, where you take a day where you simply be until you get an impulse to go do something and then you go do that. One of the rules is you can't do any business related projects including emails, returning calls. In short nothing scheduled and no "have to 's." I've done this for a day and for blocks of time and I find it really helps me distinguish between "being centered" movement from "doing centered movement."
Megan

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Be Like a Baby and Be

In the Dream Building series my partner and I have been teaching this month, we've been exploring the power of learning how to be. How all creation and action comes from our being. Lots of folks have become human doings. I'm a recovering human doing myself. I'm in the process of re-learning how to be.

So..I was at my Yoga session today and my teacher mentioned that the pose we were in was one of the first ways a baby begins to look around it's environment. In that moment I had this thought babies are all about being. They're not worried if they're wearing name brand onesies or rushing off to work, they're simply being them, which mostly is curious and playful. Then I had the awareness of the tremendous amount of growth that occurs in those formative years. They learn a whole new language, they learn how to crawl, walk, grasp, roll, climb, grow hair, grow tall, and pretty much how life works. I wonder if I/we spent more time cultivating our being if our growing would be easier and quicker. I'm thinking of weight lifting and how when you are lifting the weights how the muscles are breaking down. It's not until we rest that the muscles can rebuild and grow.

I'm going to try and experiment. I intend to spend time everyday being. Giving myself time to be and rebuild. I invite all of you reading this to try this on as well. Be Like a Baby and Be.
I'd love to hear form you how you best BE!!!
Later
Megan

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Thank-you

Thank-you all who posted. I love that my experiences can serve others as well as me. That's the big fun of being a teacher. Keep sharing your wonderings and learnings.
Love
Megan

Monday, January 21, 2008

Always Getting What You Want

So, this last weekend I got very intimate with the porcelain throne if you know what I mean. I don't often get sick so when I do it's often a doosey. As I look at this year's intention around being spacious I realized as I posted last week that that hadn't been happening. My body decided to take things into it's own hands and force the issue. My experience is that when I don't listen my body will find some way to get the message to me. So in front of God and all of you, I wish to appreciate my body for helping me do what I had been unable or unwilling to do for myself. I also appreciate my partner Annabeth for giving me ruthless feedback about when I was still trying to push through things, like I did today. I appreciate that when I make a commitment it is for real and the universe and me and my body create the perfect circumstances for me to learn what I most need to learn for myself.

Going forward I recommit to spaciousness and to listening to my body when my head is pretending that I'm taking enough time and space for me. I choose the easier route going forward; the path that doesn't include such an intimate relationship with the toilet.

INVITATION: Take a moment to notice how the universe is giving you exactly what you said you wanted, even if it isn't taking the form you thought it should. Appreciate how you are manifesting that. If a learning is coming in an uncomfortable form, get proactive. Take a direct action towards your intent. We're either directly or indirectly getting exactly what we want. The more direct we are the more easeful the path.
See you next week
Megan

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Noticing and Recommitting

Thanks everyone for sharing your precious dreams for the new year. I'm imagining that you have experienced successes and blocks to your new vision this last week. One of the things you can reliably count on is that whenever you make bold statements of what you want, you end up with support and often also get to see where you've been stopping yourself.

One of my intentions this year is to live spaciously. I've lived a lot of my life in overwhelm and overdrive. I get lots done but sacrifice my well being. So for me spacious means that I allow myself plenty of space and time to naturally create all that I choose. So of course yesterday I felt the old familiar buzz of the "I've got so much to do and no time to do it" My old pattern rearing it's head for observation. At this point I get to say "Hello, overwhelm, how are you today?" One of the ways I know to open into space is to breathe. Deep breathing literally creates more space in our bodies. So as I'm writing this I'm taking deep breaths and recommitting to spaciousness. In the past when I would get off track I used to either beat myself up or stall myself out by trying to figure out why I got off track. This one simple technique of noticing when I'm off track and recommitting to what I want has saved me so much time and effort. The energy I used expend in my old tactics is now put into bringing myself back in the game.

TRY IT ON:
Notice if you have gotten off track from any of your New Year's Intentions. Simply notice and recommit to your original intent. You may need to do this about 1000 more times through the year this is part of the process. As long as your bring yourself back in the game you can't lose.

Good Luck
Megan

Monday, January 7, 2008

Keep the Intentions Coming

I feel inspired by the 2 people who posted their intentions and I want to put a shout out for more. I'd love us all to hold space for one another as we step more deeply into our creatorship.
Love
Megan
P.S If you haven't noticed I also intend to post more consistently.

Sunday, January 6, 2008

GREAT IN 'O8

Thought I would share my motto this year, Great in '08. I feel excited for this year. 2007 in numerology is a 9 which is a completion year. 2008 is a 1 which is all about new beginnings and pioneering new projects.

Over the last few months I've noticed myself and many others clearing out old grunge. I feel like I completed and let go of a ton of emotional energy this last few months. I feel like I'm just looking into the new as I've still been doing completions from last year.

I feel excited to launch new projects and dreams over this next year. Here are some of my intentions for this year: I intend to launch my speaking career and get my new genius products out to the world. I'm excited for all I'm co-creating with my luscious partner Annabeth as we move into health, wealth and more connection this year. My new business, LifeWorks, with my genius team members Troy and Nick are creating a new model for business: a conscious genius company. A company where everyone is doing exactly what they love, based on core principles of integrity and a commitment to creative fulfillment as well as wealth..Pretty Cool Huh?
I'd love to hear about your intentions for the year. Write em up and share them. It's one thing to have a dream and keep it hidden. There is power in expression. So dare to express your dream.
If any of you are local you are welcome to attend our new Dream Building Series where you will learn to dream the best year imaginable and learn to put legs underneath it.

Tues nights 8 to 9:30pm.
989East 900South suite b2

With Love
Megan