Abundance From the Inside

For the last 2 months I have been leading a tele-course on changing your relationship with money. We've been playing with money stories and last week I gave some feedback to a few of the participants on this subject. One of my LifeWorks team mates suggested I post this to my blog. I thought that was a great idea, so here you have it.

Feeling abundant has nothing to do with your bank account. If we have money there, we might get a false sense of relief or o.k.ness or you fear that you can't create it again or never feel like whatever is there is enough. Then there are the people who have money, but in their mind they are poor. The trick is to not outsource your abundance to what the bank account says, or to what you wish it would say, but to connect in with a deeper knowing that you are o.k. in this moment and the next and the next. Throughout our lives our bank statement will go up and down, true abundance is knowing your o.k. no matter what.

As many of you know I love Tennis. Recently I was watching the U.S. Open and I heard some of the announcers say that the mark of a true champion is that you can't tell by watching them if they are up or down in a match, their play is the same (their best game) no matter what the score is. WONDER QUESTION ALERT. I wonder how I could play full out no matter what my bank account says? Try it on. Let me know what happens.
Later
Megan
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SACRED DOG PRACTICES

I've not been blogging as of late with my travels and new products I'm playing with. This is just a quick check in to let you know I'm still here. I plan to be more regular as of my return to SLC after Nov 10th.
Recently one of my students sent me this story about an old dog that was being put down and there was a little blurb about how we humans might learn something from our furry friends. I'm currently exploring the lie on my back routine and I rather enjoy it.

Remember, if a dog was the teacher you would learn things like:

When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.
Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.
Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure Ecstasy.
Take naps.
Stretch before rising.
Run, romp, and play daily.
Thrive on attention and let people touch you.
Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.
On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.
On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.
When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
Be loyal.
Never pretend to be something you're not.
If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.
When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle Them gently.
ENJOY EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY DAY!

I'll be posting next week, until then I suggest taking on one of the "Dog Practices" and let me know how it goes.
Wagging my Tail
Megan

How Bout a Little bit of R and R?

As a follow up to the last post I've come up with my own formula for creating balance. I think this is Cool. Most people, when they think of R&R, it looks like numbing out or passing out. I got to thinking about my Bikram Yoga class which is all about going all the way in to the pose and then resting. Their philosophy is if you don't go at 100% you can't go into a full rest. In other words in order to be able to rest you have to risk. I've had the experience many times of going half ass in a pose and then feeling my body not be able to let go. Conversely have you ever felt a "really good tired" after a full day of adventure and experience?

My new experiment is called Risk and Rest. When we stretch ourselves it's important to allow time for integration to allow ourselves to adjust to the expansion . On the other hand I know when I've been stuck in a comfort zone and not risking enough, I feel restless and no matter how much rest I get, it's never enough.

I had tea with my tennis team today and there is an older lady (late 60's, killer forehand) who was telling me that it is important to her to do something to stretch herself at least once a year. Last year she went dog sledding for three days. She said that she was so exhilarated that she didn't come down for days. She expressed that she feels more alive and confident and that she carries this forward to challenges in her life where she thinks "well if did that..I can do this."

I think I've always known this principle on some level (see the post: Fear Play at Lagoon) and now I feel I'm incorporating it into my daily life as well as those big life opportunities. These days I often challenge myself to risk in some area on a daily basis. Lately that has translated into following through on some things I've been scared to do. I seem to sleep better on those nights.
I'm also noticing my life and career is launching in new and surprising ways. I feel more alive than I have in years.

I follow up my risking by watching my favorite show "Ellen" or playing tennis or a taking nap. Sometimes I do a little celebration dance..Ya Me!!

This week's challenge is to look for some area to risk in.. maybe take an action step that you've been avoiding or maybe sign up for that dance class you've been thinking about. Then see if you can begin to challenge yourself everyday, just a little. Life begins outside our comfort zone. So let life begin, but remember to celebrate and rest afterwards and you will train your body to easefully expand.
Happy R and R-ing
Megan

Sthira and Suka

Wow,
I recently experienced the coolest individual yoga session. I learned about these 2 sankrit words, Sthira which means steadiness and Sukha which means alertness. My yoga instructor interprets this using the words, strength and ease. If I'm not being challenged in some way meaning no strength is required then I might tend to stagnate. Conversely if I'm struggling with all my might I'm going to get burnt out. It is my understanding that the point in a pose is to use just enough strength that I'm present and alert but with enough ease that I can sustain it for a long period of time. COOL BEANS!!!I thought to myself. This is exactly what I've been looking for in my life to. It seems like I go back and forth between using up all my energy and steam and then totally being out of commission for a day or two. I am excited to explore the balance of risking and challenging myself with ease and fun, so I can sustain my creative energy for longer periods of time. Today I challenged my self to complete this blog and now I'm going outside in the sunshine with a good book. I'll let you know about what I discover.
Talk to you soon
Megan

I'm Back..New Blog Poll

Took a little hiatus, to finish up some things on my new website...www.megansillito.com. and rest. I had the thought hmm..what do my readers most want to hear about. So I want to invite you to take the Blog Poll at the side of this column and vote for what you want me to write about. If there is something that you want to hear about that's not listed then please just leave me a post, they come directly to my inbox. I'm also willing to blog about individual questions you might have for me. The intention of this blog is to share my learning's and through that provide some pointers and tips that might help you with yours. Love to hear from you.
Megan

I'm a frickin genius.

Today I was collaborating with a client and I coached him to do something I've forgotten about in the last few months and that is to remember that I am my own best coach. I'm a ferocious learner and I tend to have about 4 to 6 books going at the same time, while taking workshops and being part of telecourse groups. I'm always looking for cutting edge tools and techniques. I'm able to assimilate other people's brilliance very naturally and quickly. Today I was reminded by my own great coaching that I am my best resource. I know that within me are the best ideas and instincts because they are uniquely designed for me. I've never been a fan of the cookie cutter approach which seems to be pervasive these days. We are individual and therefore how we evolve is unique to us. Truly as a coach I'm assisting people to discover their own answers while teaching them new tools and new ways to think about things. Today I recommit to be quiet every day for just a little while and listen to myself. I know that everything I need is inside of me. When I seek external learning I know I'm simply looking for reminders of what I already know. Have you met your inner coach? Let me know what you find.

Fear Play at Lagoon

So last week my partner Annabeth and I went to Lagoon (an amusement park) with our friends Mary and Nick. First of all I love Lagoon, I love the scary rides I love the roller coasters, I love the rides where I get soaked..well you get the point. In recent years when I do these kind of activities I take the opportunity to create transformation through playful physical experiences. I believe we don't get full learning until we get it in our bodies. Basically I've learned to create real inexpensive fun workshops for myself.
For example, there is this ride at Lagoon called the Catapult. Basically you get in a little round cage that's attached to cables which are connected to 2 tall (over 100 feet) poles. The idea is they strap you in and launch you into space about 200 feet. Then you bounce up and down for awhile until you come back to the earth. Big Fun!!! So last year was my first time. It was that time of night when the sky is midnight blue and the stars are really clear. I set an intention that I would get a body experience of launching myself nationally. My intention over the last year has been to start the move towards speaking and coaching on a national level. I've bungee jumped a bunch but never been shot up. I have to say it was one of the most exhilarating experiences of my life, going up into the starry night seeing lights and stars not knowing which way is up or down. The only thing I could hear was my own laughter (everyone else chickend out). After the ride I knew I had the sensation of launching in every cell of my body. Over the next weeks and months I attracted amazing opportunities to present and hob nob with international coaches and presenters.
Now cut to this year. I asked my friend Mary if she wanted to go with me. At first she declined and then I told her the story of the previous year..She said oh..well I have a fear I'd like to get through and it feels about the same as when I think of myself on that ride. When she finally started to consider it she got real scared, but being the committed learner she is she chose in.
As we are getting strapped into the contraption I looked over at her lily white face (she has a tan and it was still white.) The man getting us situated was very compassionate. I know Mary likes music so I asked him to sing us a song, however he was very shy about his voice and said no. The waiting is really the hardest part. The cage turns upwards so our backs were to the ground and our faces to the sky. I think this is true in life too, the anticipation is generally way scarier than the actual thing. Any way I digress............R U scared yet?
So we launch up into space and about 20 seconds seconds later I hear Mary laughing and totally letting go. She was having the time of her life. Her fear turned into release and joy. Afterwards we were watching the video of the ride and I could see clearly the moment she went from fear to absolute bliss. Thank you Mary for being so brave, for showing me what the other side of fear really looks like. She reported afterwards feeling totally different in her body and not feeling fear about the prior issue.
So often in my life I've noticed that fear once I've stepped through it transforms itself into passion, confidence, growth or peace. In this way I see fear as my ally. I simply need to walk with it and find creative ways to play with it. As we go to new heights we often get to go through the fear gateway. If you are really afraid about something chances are something better wants to come in, by moving through the fear we create a space for the new. If you're in SLC go check out the catapult. Happy flying.

Fear Play

Howdie Folks,
How did the fear play go? Well I have a funny story. After writing last weeks post my computer froze up and has been in the fix it shop for a week. I realized that my computer was literally a metaphor for how I was freezing up around several projects I'm launching including the writing of this blog. So my laptop was simply supporting my fear by giving me a great out for not completing some things. I find that life is the most marvelous reflection of what is going on inside of me. If you want to know what's happening on the inside simply notice what is occurring on the outside.
So, I told you I was going to give you a tip for dealing with fear this week. So, once I realize and name my fear I take several deep belly breaths for about 1 minute while breathing in and out of my nose. This switches you out of flight or flight. Sometimes while I'm breathing I repeat the phrase "I feel afraid". This almost always shifts the fear. If there is still fear I will try to match it with my hands. I tune into how the fear is moving in my body; fear is simply bits of energy that are in motion or stuck in no motion in our bodies. So when you match the fear with movement, especially the hands, it tends to give the energy a way to move out. Fear is different than other emotions in that it can't simply be felt, it has to be moved in some way, whereas you can feel sad and take a moment and breathe and feel and it shifts.
In my 12 years of coaching myself and others I'm really clear that when someone is stuck, there is generally some feeling stuck as well. I am always amazed that when I simply let myself feel what is really going on, things shift and my life moves forward again. I plan to continue to play with my fear this week and I invite you to play along with me. I will give some more tips next time.
Megan

The Fear Zone

Lately I've been looking at how my fear behaves. In my work with the Hendricks I learned about the four f's..or the four main ways we deal with fear. They are in no particular order Freeze, Flee, Faint, and Fight. Basically fight or flight with a couple variations. Freeze is kinda like a deer in headlights(my personal favorite),faint is overwhelm or spacey feelings, "I'm confused" is the cry of the fainter. We each have our own combo plate so to speak. My first response is to freeze and as soon as I unthaw get the heck out of Dodge. Some people are fight first ask questions later. I've been exploring this for quite sometime and have found it so valuable to know that I'm afraid and how that looks.

In the last few weeks I've discovered that these also translate into behaviors. For instance I've discovered the procrastination is really a form of the Freeze response. I'm simply scared. It is so useful to name something what it really is. Many of us tend to judge ourselves as lazy or procrastinators , which is not helpful, in fact it keeps us repeating the same behaviors, whereas when we realize that we are afraid we can address that in a direct manner.

In fact science has now proven that simply naming the emotion we are feeling has a calming effect on the emotional center of the brain. More importantly we can now face the real issue, so there is a chance of creating movement. I notice when I do this I shift into taking action.

So my invitation this week is to take a look at your fear behaviors..i.e what is it you do instead of take the actions you know will create the results you are wanting. Some of you may go into the T.V zone, some of you might clean obsessively. When you notice one of these behaviors pause and say to yourself.."hmm I must be afraid." See if you feel a shift in your energy or behavior. Next time I will talk about some ways that I have learned to move through fear.

I Took the Challenge

So last week I invited all of us to take some area where there was a negative focus and channel it into something positive. I chose to channel my worry thoughts around food into connection. Wow..did I ever have a cool day. I reconnected with 2 friends I hadn't seen for a long time and created a great time with them. I connected with 2 other people I had been trying locate. Also, two very key people offered to support me as I go national. Woo Wee!!
This is so simple yet I(we) often forget that we can shift things simply with a shift of attention. My mentor Katie Hendrick(see link) said once that the power to shift our attention is the power of transformation. I really got a body learning on this that day. When I put my focus into something I don't want I'm not only attracting that, but I'm taking it away from something I really want. I read once that in every moment we are either creating or destroying. Creative life force energy is always moving through us, our attention determines where it goes. Just like a fire hose pointed in the wrong direction could be disastrous. So my invitation is to tune into your attention and see where your hose is pointed. If you don't like it change direction. Are you creating or destroying? Remember you can post any of your learning's or ask questions on this blog.
Right now I'm off to create a little night time snooze.
See you next week
Megan

I Hope You Dance

The country song "I Hope You Dance" (don't know who it's by), is one of the songs that I feel most deeply in my body. The song for me is about getting off the sidelines in life and fully participating with our whole selves. I have always had this sense of so many possibilities for myself and everyone around me. I never understood how people could be bored, I can think of about 20 things I could be experiencing in every moment. There is so much beauty to see, so many books to read, so much amazing art, so many cool people I haven't met, so many places to see in the world, so many water adventures still to see, so many opportunities to create and express and love. Now I'm not saying I never lounge around and do nothing..but hanging out in nothing is pretty awesome when the rest of my life is so full.

Today I got a forwarded e-mail, normally I don't open forwarded mail but because it was my friend Daisy I did. The e-mail was about putting off joy. The paragraph that most struck me was about the women on the Titanic who may have passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night in order to cut back...Man that would've sucked. It made me think of all the worrying I do about what I eat, how much I eat..did I just eat too much? I realize how much energy I'm wasting in this arena, that I could be using to participate in all things I love. So for today I commit to me and you that I will use that energy for creating deeper connection with myself and anyone I play with today.

The bottom paragraph of this letter reads: "Life may not always be the party we hoped for...but while we are here we might as well dance." I challenge anyone who reads this to take some area where you are using your energy to beat yourself up or worry and put that towards something you love instead..read a book..write a poem..tell someone you love them..Life is Short Jump In!!
Thanks for reading
P.S I'd love to hear any success stories you have by taking on this challenge today. You can
mail me at megan@mslifeworks.com

Megan

A Little History

I grew up believing that I wasn't talented. As a result I went in a destructive direction for many years because I didn't think I had anything of value to give. When I discovered that I had gifts to give, it literally saved my life. I believe that most destructive behavior occurs because people either don't know their true purpose or they don't believe they have what it takes to do what they really want.

When I was 6, in Sunday school class, and everyone was talking about their talents..I was sitting there like "God forgot Me" Nothing I did resembled that of the other kids. I went home and said to my dad(who knew everything at the time) I'm scared that I don't have any talents; my dad paused for what seemed like a very long time and said "Well you pray really well dear." Even at 6 I knew I was in real trouble if that was my only talent.

Now, I realize that my dad actually saw me. What he was saying was that my talents weren't tangible, they were spiritual in nature. My gifts are not about building things or making things, they have to do with essence..a spiritual essence that I carry with me. I have the ability to see into people, to teach and to transform, It's in everything I do. Whether I'm connecting to Spirit, a tree, a friend or you right now..it's part of who I am and it has transformative effect in the world.

Other than sports this is where my gifts lie, but I didn't know how to make it real for a long time. Some of these gifts were awakened in me when one of my good friends was killed in a drunk driving accident. This was not only a wake up call for me but many of my friends turned to me for spiritual support. I didn't get that people saw that in me..I was partying like a rock star along with the rest of my friends. My friends asked me to lead the prayers and the grave side service, I was scared but stepped up and something just came through me like I hadn't felt since I was a child. Through this event I began to remember my purpose and began to pursue a path of healing and service. I guess being able to pray does come in handy from time to time.
Later
Megan

Life Coach with a Zip/ The interview continues

Nick: What exactly do you do?

Megan: I consider myself a genius life coach. Which means I assist people to expand into what they were meant to be and do. I believe that everyone was born with natural genius qualities and abilities. One person may have a genius for math, while another sings or writes. I have a genius for networking. When I coach people I help them see what they were uniquely designed for and clear up anything in the way of their ability to live in their purpose. It is a skill to be able to see what your potential is and to consistently take action on those things. I teach people to do just that.

I haven't met anyone who does quite what I do. There are life coaches who help people set and achieve goals and then there are healers who help people clear past issues. I go beyond both of these. I hold space for generating a vision that encompasses their genius qualities and all of who they are, and I'm really good at seeing what is in the way of that; where people are sabotaging and assist them in moving beyond where they have let themselves go. I share with them tools to create a life of their choosing,what they really want. Sometimes that means helping them dissolve their limitations and sometimes its more about getting them to see their genius qualities and owning those gifts.

I don't believe in the "5 year plan" so much. I think it is much more powerful to have a clear vision that is big enough to encompass all of who you are, but to put more energy into the present moment. This is where transformation occurs, in real time.. I teach people how to tune in to what wants to happen next, and to take inspired action. In this way life is always fresh and unfolding.
Like I know I am moving out into a bigger stage, I don't know all the details, I simply follow what's next..like hey Megan why don't you start a blog? So I did.

Taking the Mystery out of Megan

Welcome to my blog! I will be sharing fun, transformative learnings from my life. This first post is an excerpt from an interview with Nick James (SLC famous D.J./genius superstar). The following is what I am about.

Nick:
What are you about?

Megan:
First and foremost I am about playing. I am about possibilities and discovering choices and new ways to transform. I love to assist others in accessing parts of themselves they hadn’t seen before. I’m a huge fan of manifesting my potential (look what I can do) and teaching others to do the same.

At one time in my life, I really fought for my limitations. Now I’m available for what I can create. I do this by cultivating and choosing to be curious rather than judge. I do my best to be curious about a situation rather than judge it, like: Hmmm.. I wonder what this is teaching me rather than Ah. Crap.. I can’t believe I did that again…I think in every moment we have the choice to be present, and if I’m in judgment I’m unavailable for the possibilities in front of me. What is happening right now is the only thing that matters and it’s the only place I have the power to take action.

If I look at all the transformation work I have done, it’s all about looking honestly at how I’ve chosen to limit myself and making a new choice to step into a bigger playing field. Instead of I can’t do that..I say.."How can I create that?"

I do this by being present..and curious as to what the universe is teaching me in this moment. I feel like I’m playing toss with the universe. To have the most fun I’ve made a commitment to be available for what ever is happening. Whether that is the question coming from you in this moment or the pipes in my house breaking, it is a universal toss that says: "Megan pay attention I’m playing with you right now." I get to chose what I will do with it. The more ready I am the more gentle the toss. If I am checked out I generally get a ball in the head (i.e the pipes bursting scenario) and when I’m available to play, the whole universe opens up.

So my toss to all of you reading this is to wonder.."How can I be ready for full out play with the
universe?"

It's really like a game of tennis, which I also love. When the person across the net hits the ball to you, if you are ready you will have many options; if you aren't then you stick out your racket and hope for the best. You can't win playing defensively, you have to play creatively. I choose to work with a coach because he helps me build the foundation necessary to play at my optimal level.

I believe that anyone who wants to really excel needs coaching. We would never see an Olympian come to compete without an array of coaches. Many of us have Olympic size dreams and yet don't give ourselves the kind of support necessary to achieve them. At any given time I have at least 2 coaches and 1 or 2 support groups that I participate in. This is a safe way to practice getting present, so that I have the foundation to create my dreams.

If your dreams are any more challenging than say that of a parking booth attendant, I suggest you find a coach, a support program or at the very least a buddy that you can check in with and get feedback from on a consistant basis. Continually looking at myself and getting curious is the cornerstone of my success.

More next week...